Amelin林颖昭

 When life seems to be repeating itself everyday, I feel like I am being trapped in a cage. But it is our imagination that’s creating the cage, not the life.  Sometimes I wonder what should I do to make the right choice? What is the supposed right answer? These  two questions have stranded me to suffocation. I became so nervous and anxious, immobile in my fear. Just yesterday I tried meditation, I used to not believe it. But I have read a book wrote by a ninety-year-old  Japanese grandmother, and I have got many tips from her about how to live a life. I always see hills with green grass in my meditating vision, rivers, blue sky, far away city, birds flying, I am swinging high on a swing, a girl smiling when kissed by the breeze… it was exactly like what would be in a fairy tale.  Then I understand those are things that I cherish in life. Nature, freedoms, excitement, exploration, and happiness. By realising what I care most in life, I do not put my focus on the ...

 Of course now I wonder what am I thinking. Conscious mind sometimes really can’t solve the riddle. A lot of things gradually come to our sense after so many years, is it not right? Like my mom’s love for me, now I see it as an invisible love that existed in the background, just like how we don’t know what god has planned for us, and what message does the universe has to tell us. I guess I am not a failure, even though I usually thought that and felt that. I guess that is an involuntary act. Looking back, I am quite an activist, I did all that my soul asked, at least I fulfilled myself, at least I never let myself down. I had liked boys over the years and I reached out to them in different approaches that sometimes I could even replay it the my mind, going back to that day and still feel that is the good choice I have made to have done something with that boy. But things do not always turn out the way we planned, right? The boy I had wanted so much on those days  did not come ...